When I first started hard core back in March I decided that if I was ever going to get where I wanted to be I needed to stop making excuses why I couldn't do it, because I had plenty of them. Excuses are a big sign of unreadiness (hmmm, that's most likely not a real word), and if you're not ready you're not ready, and that's a personal thing. It's a lot of work and a lot of commitment so if you really aren't in a good place with it, it won't last, and that's all but a guaruntee! Anyway, I wanted to cut out the bull I was feeding myself and decided if I wasn't willing to do it, then I needed to say just that, and not give XYZ excuses why I "couldn't" do it. When I made myself decide that, I chose to cut the excuses out because I really didn't want to be one of those people who decided to be ok with being obese. To each his/her own, but I was unhappy and miserable and I wasn't ok with that and needed to stop giving myself permission to continue on that way!
So what's my point!? Well, I get asked, quite a lo,t variations of the question "How have you lost so much weight!?" I don't know what people reallly expect me to say, but they almost always seem disappointed in my answer. Don't get me wrong, my absolute favorite subject in the world is weight loss and all things related (nutrition, exercise, supplements, etc. etc.) -- I'm always thrilled to talk about it, but I can tell when the person asking is hoping I will answer "Actually, I found this new diet where all you eat is pizza and ice cream in whatever quantities you want, you just have to jump up and down 3 times every hour and you will lose a crap ton of weight!" I've learned to answer very simply "I eat quite a lot less". This seems to stop the onslaught of excuses people tend to start throwing at me if I tell them in detail what I've done; or if they are actually really interested they will ask more questions, which I'm happy to answer. For some reason my weight loss effects some people in a way that it makes them feel the need to defend their own weight issues to me, that does make me feel very bad sometimes. But like I was saying, if I go ahead with the details after the first inquiry, it tends to lead the person I'm talking to into giving me a laundry list of reasons why what I've done isn't possible for them. I rarely will call people on their bull, because, well it's really none of my business, but some of the excuses I hear are just terrible.
Excuse #1 - THE FOOD: It's too expensive to eat healthy. Someone else buys my food so I have to eat what they buy and make. I cook for a family and my kids and/or partner won't support me in my food changes because I am at their mercy.
Nope - wrong. You don't have to buy all organic, or shop at Whole Foods/Spouts/Other-Expensive-Granola-Store. There are plenty of healthy foods that are not expensive at all, not to mention you don't have to do a complete 180 and go from whatever it is you're eating now to eating like a vegan tree hugger. AND besides that, you don't have to eat "healthy" to lose weight, you just have to be in a calorie deficit, you can eat any food you damn well please (not saying that's the ideal)! No matter what food is available to you, it is possible to lose weight. Case closed.
Excuse #2 - THE EXERCISE: I can't afford a gym membership. I have an injury so I can't workout. I'm too busy to workout. I hate working out. One time I worked out and it was so super hard, I won't do it again.
Uh, no. Nope, nope, and no. You don't have to workout to lose weight! Of course being fit and active is important to being healthy, but it certainly isn't neccessary to drop pounds. PLUS you don't need a gym to work out, you don't even need home gym equipment. It's simple, you google at home workouts, or look it up on youtube, it's a thing believe it or not. Plus there are about a billion workout videos on the market (for cheap), Netflix has a ton of them to stream, you can go for a walk or run or dance in your living room (free), AND someone busier than YOU worked out today. Or just don't workout at all, if you are in a calorie deficit you will lose weight, working out is the icing on the cake.
Excuse #3 - I CAN'T LOSE WEIGHT: I've tried every single diet and exercise plan ever made and I just can't lose weight. My body wasn't meant to be a size 2. I'm big boned.
This one is the one that irritates me the most. Your mommy may have told you you're special, but you are not a biological marvel. I would seriously hope that if someone truly thought this they'd go to the doctor to see what was wrong with them. I'm NOT denying that there are indeed medical conditions that make it very difficult to lose weight, but this is typically not what's going on. There's a saying "every diet works if you follow it" and that's pretty much true, although different things work better for different people. If you only follow it for a week and expect to lose 30 pounds you will be disappointed. Weight loss take a lot of TIME! If you "follow it" but you are taking bites here and there of extra stuff and not really truly following it, you will be disappointed. People want to say, "it's not me, it's XYZ", when it really and totally is them! And what's the deal with that "size 2" excuse, I hear that one all the time. So, what? You can't be a size 2 so you have to be a size 22!? NO! You can be a healthier size, which doesn't mean you have to be a size 2! And no, those aren't your bones, that's fat, cut the crap.
It's not at ALL that I think everyone should be losing weight or strivng to be a fitness model, not even a little bit. BUT, it drives me batty when people act like they want to lose weight but aren't willing to really do even the smallest thing to achieve it. I'm not interested in hearing people's excuses! It's hard, and if it weren't no one would be overweight. I have worked my ass off (quite literally), and when people brush it off like "oh, well it's easy for you because of <whatever>, whereas it's hard for me because of <whatever>" that pisses me off! It's never been easy, never will be! Just like ANYTHING in life, success very rarely comes to those who do nothing to work for it.
So so true! Weight Watchers themselves has a quiz to help you know if you are mentally ready to lose the weight.
ReplyDeleteGood job, girl! I'm losing seventy pounds for the second time around (after gaining my seventy pounds back with pregnancy!)You inspire me with the fact that you lost a lot after you had your December baby.
Here's a question though. Do you EVER cheat on your diet? :)
That's been my experience, too. They want something other than years of slow, steady, hard work. Not perfection, but ruthless, unexcused consistency. They don't want to hear they have to change their mindset to change their habits, and that both changes must be permanent if they want real health and success in this way. They also don't want to hear that there are consequences to their years of abusing their body - people would often rather eat a donut and inject insulin than abstain from the donut and keep all fingers and toes. Even truly sick folks are often not mentally ready to make those changes, and there's just no forcing it.
ReplyDeleteIt's why I spent mot of my life obese, and then only did this one diet (with many tweaks and adjustments along the way). I knew I was fat, but I wasn't really ready to change until I was, and then it was just a matter of time and action. It's not overnight, in a pill, or easy. But it is pretty simple!