6 weeks ago today I started this journey! I'm down 17.2 pounds to date since March 22nd, and have lost 33.4 pounds since my highest pregnancy weight in December -- 19 weeks ago; I have 9.6 lbs to go until I'm at my pre-pregnancy weight, and I am going to work my ass off to ensure that comes off by the end of May.
I've only been weight training for a week and a half (4 sessions total), but I kid you not it has made a difference already! When I lost weight in the past, my weight training was sporadic, at best. I have always been the queen of cardio; I can do cardio for hours, and that's great for weight loss. But weight training is what shapes your body, I know this of course, but it's HARD and it HURTS! I'm doing it though, because it's worth it and it makes me feel amazing afterwards. I know a few months, even a few weeks, from now I will be so much stronger and in better shape. I don't want to be skinny, I want to be strong and FIT!
The next 5 days are going to be challenging for me. Tomorrow is Jason's first day off in 8 days! Friday we are taking Emma to breakfast (she loves pancakes) and then to the zoo. Saturday is a little party for her at my In-Laws' house. Sunday is a little party for her at my parents' house. Monday is her actual birthday. I have to remind myself that I am not required to eat the equivalent of an entire cake over the coming days. I have to commit to getting my workouts in. I have to commit to myself that if I eat foods that aren't my everyday foods that I will eat them in moderation. And I have to keep telling myself that while it's great to have yummy foods and enjoy celebrations, it's not ok to overindulge because "I deserve it". I've never once overindulged and felt good about it, I have to keep this in mind. I have been working so so so hard and I don't want to set myself back. My issue is that I can plan until the cows come home, but it's those in-the-moment decisions that usually screw me over, I'm impulsive. That's not to say one bad extended weekend undoes everything, because it certainly doesn't, but it's more than that for me. For me it's about learning to control myself around foods and situations that I, in the past, have completely lost control. Eating myself sick masked as anything other than self abuse is just me trying to fool myself. I have to prove to myself that it is possible for me to not feel deprived during these types of special occassions, but also that I don't have to overindulge. Food is one of my demons, and it's not something I can just cut out like when I quit smoking nearly 4 years ago. I have to learn to respect myself with food and not abuse myself with food under the mask of "treating myself". I've "treated" myself into obesity, not so much a treat at all is it? I need to keep a visual of myself sweating my ass off on the treadmill, and how long I'll have to spend burning all those extra calories off if I don't practice moderation. So my goal is: To enjoy myself, eat a little of everything that I want, don't stuff myself to sickness, get my workouts in, give myself credit for every single small food victory.
I meet with my new trainer tomorrow. I signed up for training after receiving 3 free sessions. I will meet with a trainer once every other week. She will write me a program to follow EXACTLY between our meetings. This way I get the benefit and accountability of having a trainer without the extreme budgetary hardship.
Kind of an all over post today! I'm having one of those all over type of days in my head.
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Goals so far: 1/28, 0/12, 60/1200, .4/10
Have a wonderful week with your family :)
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